Thursday, October 27, 2005

Cat a rising star

This is no photoshop trickery! This cat actually has two tongues. And a blog. She’s becoming quite the cat-lebrity.

In other news: It’s bad enough that dopey New Agers feel they have to perpetually “enlighten” the rest of us with their stupid beliefs. But why do they have to project their idiotic notions onto cats? Cats are not New Agers! They’re crazy little monsters who’ve managed to charm themselves into the cushiest job on earth. They destroy our possessions and force us to clean up their stinky poo! So if you ever get the urge to look to cats for "wellness wisdom," at least have the decency to NOT WRITE A NEWSPAPER COLUMN ABOUT YOUR VAPID NON-INSIGHTS.

“Cats know that to let go of your stress you need two things: a comfy seat and a sunbeam.” Yeah, and a willing human slave to tend to their every need. That’s why they purr all the time. I’d purr too.

Of course, cats do have to put up with some crazy shit from us from time to time. Like people who dress them in little costumes -- or put stuff on them.

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