Tuesday, November 01, 2005

The mystery of Paris Hilton's tail(s)


I was perplexed to see so many other blogs refer to Ms. Hilton’'s "“slutty bunny"” Halloween costume -- when the photos I’d seen showed clearly that she had the long fuzzy tail of a slutty cat, or perhaps slutty fox, not the round fluffy tail of a bunny.

Then I ran across other pictures from that night’s revelries, and lo and behold -- SHE HAD A BUNNY TAIL!

So what happened? Did someone sidle up to her and say, “great bunny ears, Paris, but bunnies don't actually have long tails.” Did an assistant run after her and deftly replace her cat/fox/armadillo/whatever tail with a bunny tail without her even noticing? Did her ass simply swallow the first tail whole?

Also: The slutty cat/fox/armadillo Paris has curly hair, and the slutty bunny Paris has straight hair! Has Paris been cloned?

On top of all this, I’m beginning to suspect that she wasn’t wearing a costume at all. I'm guessing she just went to get the morning paper in her underwear and the door blew shut, locking her outside, and she figured, "what the hell. I'm Paris Hilton, for god's sake. No one will even notice anything out of the ordinary."

Something smells fishy here.

Oh, sorry, just my cat’s breath. My cat’s breath smells like cat food.

P.S. The dude at dude.man.phat notes that a mystery domino pizza’s guy followed Paris around all that night. Who he?!

The Senate needs to go into closed session to debate THESE mysteries!!

UPDATE! Yet another Paris Hilton ass mystery!

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