Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Paris: Touch My Monkey!

I don’t know why people think celebrities are weird. Some looked askance at Michael Jackson’s recent, perfectly ordinary, trip to the ladies’ room to powder his nose. (Or maybe just to reattach it.) Now Page Six is making a big fuss about Paris Hilton's newest Best Friend Forever, a little monkey named Baby Luv. So the two of them were shopping for underwear together at Agent Provocateur in Vegas last Saturday -- hey, monkeys like to shop too, especially for lacy underthings. And bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

Anyhoo, Baby Luv then, allegedly, “bit Hilton and clawed her face.” As if! He was just fixing Paris’ makeup. Later in the evening he disrupted Kelly Osbourne’s birthday party at the Hard Rock. Come on, people! That’s less a crime than a public service.

At left, an artist’s rendition of Paris and Baby Luv once Baby grows up. And also if Paris is turned into a cat, but, hey, this is cat.lebrity and that’s just how we roll.

Meanwhile, here’s some actual pictures of Paris and her actual monkey, who actually doesn’t look very much like an actual monkey at all.

PS: Yeah, I know. This is not my best photoshopping job ever. It's sort of lame. In my defense, it's hard to find decent pictures of cats and monkeys together. None of those I found even came close to the Daily Show's oft-used footage of a monkey washing a cat.

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