Thursday, October 06, 2005

Katie Holmes' Silent Scream

TomKat have successfully mated! What, you heard?

We're guessing that somehow this involved a turkey baster. Or some elaborate ritual a la Rosemary's Baby. But this blog is all about the kitties, so we'll just pretend it went down like this. Sometimes it's fun to pretend, eh Tom?

Anyhoo, according to the New York Daily News, Katie will have to do some big time pretending when the little monster's ready to come out -- the baby, I mean. She's going to have to pretend it doesn't hurt a bit. See, not only do Scientologists say no to drugs (even the good ones) but they also:

insist on "silent birth" because they believe it's traumatic for babies to hear their mothers groan or cry. "Maintain silence in the presence of birth to save the sanity of the mother and the child and safeguard the home to which they will go," church founder L. Ron Hubbard wrote in his best-selling "Dianetics."

What if the baby's alleged daddy is jumping up and down on couches screaming like a banshee? Won't that just make the thetans ever madder?

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